Fire Emblem Awakening: Forgotten Dreams
by MakBlaze6
Summary: There was a reason that Naga had secluded this Outrealm from the others, and who could blame her? After all, Chrom has absolutely no regard for others, Lissa is more mature than most of the population, and Frederick is anything but stern. Unfortunately for our amnesiac tactician, he has been dragged into this madness firsthand. Warning: characters are absurdly OOC.
1. The Verge of Stupidity

**A/N: This is by far the strangest idea that I have ever had, Fanfiction or not. Nevertheless, it was really fun to right.  
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**Obvious, OBVIOUS note: All characters (save for Robin,) are going to be absurdly OOC. Emphasis on absurdly. It's intentional, so don't think that I am hating on a particular character if they do stupid things or just so happen to be a jerk, though not all of them are going to be jerks.  
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**Seriously, though, this is all for fun.**

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><p>He simply sat there in darkness, pondering the strange dream that he had seen moments before. Who was that man? Why did his name sound so familiar? Why did he... Why did he kill him? He had no idea what was going on, or at least he didn't remember what was.<p>

"Chrom, we have to do _something._" The man could feel his senses returning to him. _Voices?_ he thought to himself. _What is going on?_

"And what do you propose we do?"_That voice... Could it be? _The man slowly opened his eyes, eyeing the two figures standing above him: a blonde girl, and a blue haired man.

"I... I am not sure." the pair both turned toward him with surprise, seeing that he had awakened.

"About time you're up." the blue-haired man jokingly rolled his eyes at him.

"Greetings." the girl smiled at him as well.

"Dude, why couldn't you have just slept in a bed?" This earned a nod of agreement from the girl. "Give me your hand."

As he reached out for it, Chrom quickly withdrew his hand, earning a slight groan of annoyance from the amnesiac.

"Hah! Did you see that Frederick?! He fell for it!" He then turned and then proceeded to high-five a tall man in blue armor, and both of them began to roar in laughter.

_The familiar feeling is gone. This is stupid. _The man internally facepalmed.

"Chrom! Frederick! Just help the poor man up!" the blonde-haired girl yelled.

And yet the two men just stared at her.

"Ugh, fine! I will just have to do it myself!" the girl just groans and grabs his hand, pulling him onto his feet.

And the man simply shook his head. Something felt off, and yet he wondered what it was.

"Please excuse these two, they just behave like stereotypical lowborn. I plead that you don't take it to heart, however, they can be very loving." the girl nodded, before turning toward her brother. "Chrom, how about you introduce us?"

The lord simply frowned, before looking back at the tactician. "Fineeee... I'm Chrom, and that's Frederick. My stuck-up little sis is Lissa." The stuck-up part earned a slap from Lissa, which soon evolved into an argument.

...Which soon evolved into a full-on fight.

After about ten minutes, something had begun to feel off.

_Wait... Do I smell... Smoke..? Uh-oh... _He turned toward the scent, eying a large column of smoke rising above the hills.

"Fire!" he points.

Lissa immediately jumps up, but Chrom and Frederick simply stand there. "Chrom! We have to help them!" she screamed.

Yet her brother simply shrugged. "It's okay. It's just people dying."

The tactician felt his jaw drop. And yet he didn't know why. He barely knew this person, let alone knew to expect a comment along the lines of that.

"But-!"

"You know what..." Chrom smiled and put a finger on his chin. "If Mr. Fancypants over here tells us his name, then MAYBE I'll go."

_What? Just... Oh gods... I don't know my name! Er.. I'll... Duh..._

He quickly looked around in panic. What to do... What to do...

And then he heard a loud chirp. He turned to see a bird swoop past him.

_...Robin. _The name clicked. He remembered. That was his name!

"My name is Robin." he gave a sort of bow, and the four immediately darted toward the town.

"Hey Freddy! I bet I'll kill more than you!" Chrom snickered.

"Oh hell no! I'll sooner shove you off a cliff and dance over your remains before I let that happen!" the surprisingly not stern lieutenant responded.

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><p>"NOW! WE NEED TO BE A SUBTLE AS POSSIBLE IF WE WANT TO KILL EVERYTHING!" Frederick screams, despite Robin's pleads.<p>

"Frederick! Shut up!" Chrom yell-whispers.

_Finally, he says something that isn't stupid._ The words bounce across Robin's mind, a smile creeping onto his face. A wave of confidence had begun to cross over him.

"I have a plan." Robin smiles.

"Plan?" Frederick looks down from atop his horse and at the silver-haired man. "You don't need a plan when you can just run out recklessly!"

"Frederick, don't-!" Too late. The man and his horse were already in the town square, dancing around a dazed myrmidon.

The knight just sat there, dodging almost every hit from the enemy.

But that wasn't enough. Soon, the rest of the enemy army was all around him, each holding out bloodied weapons and baring psychotic grins.

The three Shepherds turned away in fear as the enemy pounced upon the great knight.

And then there was nothing.

And followed by said nothingness, was a powerful boom that sent all of the enemies flying away.

Robin looked up in dumbfounded confusion.

There he was, Frederick, standing above pile of corpses. His armor was shining in an almost cinematic manner, and-!

_Where the hell did his shirt go?_

"Hah! They can't touch this! I'm promoted!" And then he and his horse started to dance... On the corpses...

And then people began to join in.

Robin and Lissa simply sat there, jaws dropped and completely confused as to what was wrong with these people.

"Hey, Rob-bro!" Robin internally facepalmed at the name that Chrom has just given him. "You're a part of the Shepherds now!"

...What?

To be honest, Robin had just wanted to run at that point.

And so he did, but it didn't take very long for Frederick and the mobs of vicious followers to catch up to him.

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><p><strong>AN: I have absolutely no idea what I just wrote.**

**I am absolutely serious, what the hell is this?**

**Sooo... Yeah. This is my second story, (unless you count Oft Forgotten, though that's just a one shot right now... So...)**

**I am not sure, nor do I really want to know what compelled me to write this, but just know that I am currently a bit stumped at Chapter 20 of Change of Fate. I actually had a lot of it finished, but then I remembered that my mouse button has a back button built into it.**

**Goodbye, 1000 words.**

**Anyways, this was originally one of the stories that I had planned to write earlier on. It was going to be where the tactician would be named Chrom. Yep, two Chroms. You can actually do that in the game.**

**And Chrom even refers to his own name as foreign.**

**But honestly, I prefer this story much more.  
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	2. No Escape

**A/N: I didn't like the first part of this chapter as much.  
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**Hehe. More inverted personalities FTW.**

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><p>Of all things that could have possibly happened to him, he did not expect to be taken prisoner by Frederick.<p>

As of now, they were trying to get to Ylisstol. Frederick had bet Chrom that they could get back to Ylisstol before sunrise, and Chrom accepted.

Robin still had no idea what this had to do with him, and yet he hoped to not find out.

"Screw it. I'm tired." Frederick announced. With that, he proceeded to... pass out on the ground.

And then Chrom and Lissa had decided to fall asleep as well.

And they forgot about Robin.

Today was not a lucky day for him.

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><p>"Lissa, you up?" Chrom rolled onto his side, looking up at his sister.<p>

"No."

This earned a laugh from her brother. "Yeah right. I know how much Frederick's snoring bothers you."

"I'll say." a voice echoed from across the clearing. Nobody seemed to care.

"I'm gonna go burn down some trees, wanna come?" Chrom asked.

"What?! No!"

"Too bad." with that, he grabbed her hand and proceeded to drag her into the forest.

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><p>"Chrom! Let goooo...!" Lissa has continued to try and escape her brother's grip, but to no avail.<p>

Eventually he stopped.

"Here that?" he asked. Yet there was no noise. "It's quiet. Probably dry enough to burn fast."

He was right. It was quiet. Almost too quiet.

So quiet, that the eventual earthquake had nearly given them heart attacks.

"Oh hell naw! I'm outta here!" Chrom immediately let go of his sister, darting from the scene as the ground had begun to split open.

Lissa simply stared at her brother. Had Emmeryn really rubbed off on him that much?

With that, she ran toward her brother.

The two ran through the forest, dodging the scorching fireballs.

"Hah! This is tons better than I could have done!" Chrom laughed at the cataclysm. Lissa ignored him and continued to run toward a clearing in front of them.

Eventually they reached their destination, and both them had stopped to catch their breath.

Not a few seconds had passed when she had noticed something else.

"By the gods!" she screamed.

"What is i-?!" Chrom had stopped in his tracks when he saw a large crystal structure materializing in the air.

Like an eyeball, it immediately opened, spawning two 'men' from it's center.

The two hit the ground with a thud, before getting up and staring at the two.

They then looked up at the pair, eyes glowing a bright red hue.

"Lissa...? Can I hide behind you...?" he rushed behind his sister, shoving her toward the beasts.

One of them roared and rushed toward her, lifting an axe and aiming it at the princess.

Just then, the crystal structure had started to glow again. This time, a blue-haired man appeared from it, only to come down and draw his sword.

In a single second, the monsters were cut into pieces and had evaporated into a purple mist.

"W-Who are you?!" Chrom screamed at the mystery man.

"Who me?! I'm your future daughter of course!" the man sported a stupid grin, before turning and running deeper into the forest.

"...What?" Chrom stared at the spot where the man had stood.

_Probably some stupid maniac._

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><p>"STAB EVERYTHINNNNNG!" screamed Frederick. he and his horse were deflecting all of the hits of the zombies.<p>

Not the same could be said about Robin, who was still tied to said horse.

Frederick had already taken out most of the Risen when a new voice was heard from across the forest.

"OHMIGOSH! I LEFT MY PURSE AT THE INN!" a red-haired woman on a horse then marched up to the great knight. "Freddy-bear! You're hereeeee...!"

"Oh brother... There's more of them..." Robin muttered under his breath.

"Waaaaaaait!" another new voice was heard.

Then marched up an archer with cobalt-blue hair holding a purse. "Here! You left this at Southtown!" With that, he handed it to the red-headed cavalier.

Her eyes lit up upon seeing it, before soon devolving into anger.

"You stole this from me?! Didn't you?!" she scowled at the archer.

"What?! N-No! I wouldn't-!" Before he could finish, the woman jumped off of her horse and had begun to attack the archer. It was then that Robin had noticed a loose end on the ropes that tied him to the horse.

_Bingo! Freedom, here I come. _He reached for the ropes, before pulling out a sword and slowly sawing at the ends.

The ropes had soon snapped, sending Robin flailing onto the ground.

Before Frederick could react, he was already halfway through the clearing.

"HEY! YOU AREN'T GETTING AWAY FROM ME!" he screamed.

_Alright! Gotta get outta here! _He reached a quick fork in the path, taking a left and looping around.

Yet Frederick was still on his trail.

After a few more twists and turns, he had eventually just gave up the hope for tactics and had instead simply darted through the shrubbery.

_Heh! I think I got-! _His thought was interrupted as he collided with a figure in front of him. At first, he believed it to be one of the monsters that had attacked before. But then, the figure gave off a yelp of pain, something that the monsters didn't do.

"Hey! You should have been watching where you were going!" the masked man in front of him growled.

"That isn't important! I just have to-!" Before he could finish, a beefy hand had grabbed him and pulled him into the air.

Unfortunately for Robin, escape was futile.

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><p>After the masked man had introduced himself, the now group of six were on their way to Ylisstol. It seems that the archer, Virion, was being kept prisoner as well, being tied to Sully's horse.<p>

"Gods... Why are they so crazy?" Virion looked toward Robin.

"Tell me about it." they heard Lissa mumble.

"I don't know. I literally woke up in a field with now memory, and next thing I knew, I was their prisoners." he responded.

"HEY! QUIET DOWN, DAMMIT! I'M TRYING TO USE MY PASSENGER PIGEON!" Sully screamed. This shocked the two into silence.

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><p>Unfortunately for Frederick, they hadn't reached Ylisstol before sunrise. After being mocked by Chrom for about an hour, however, they did arrive at Ylisstol.<p>

"Welcome to Ylisstol, our prisoners!" Frederick mocks Robin and Virion. "Now, do either of you know anything about this city?"

"N-no...?" both of them respond.

"You see, it's ruled by the Exalt: Emmeryn."

"And she's the most psychotic big sister ever." Lissa grumbles.

That surprised Robin a bit. Sister? So that means they are...

_Oh dear.__ I'm officially scared._

The thought of Chrom being a prince was absolutely terrifying. Yet for a city with Chrom as an authority figure, it sure seemed... Lively...

Almost too lively.

"Milord!" a guard yelled as they had approached the castle gate. Upon confirming that it was indeed Chrom, they proceeded to turn and open the gate.

Afterwards, Sully left with Virion, and Frederick took Robin off of his horse. Unfortunately, he wasn't free, as he was still restrained by the ropes on his hands.

As they entered the castle, Robin couldn't help but notice the vibe that it had given off: a sort of noble serenity. It was painted and arranged flawlessly: not in a way that you would expect of possibly tyrannical rulers.

And then he saw her.

She had beautiful blonde hair, a serene green robe, and held out a smooth gold staff. To Robin, it felt as if she radiated peace.

"Chrom!" the woman yelled, her face evolving into rage. "What did I tell you about bringing in commoners?! Do I have to beat you again?!:

_... Nevermind._

"Actually, Emmeryn, this guy's our new Shepherd." he paused for a second before continuing. "Oh yeah, and there are also potato zombies roaming the woods. Soooo... Nothing out of the ordinary."

Emmeryn's frown deepened. "Gods damn it! Now how are we gonna continue our conquest?!"

"I dunno... Maybe we kill the zombies?"

"No! That would be too obvious! Clearly, Naga wants us to ignore the zombies and conquer everything else first! Simple!"

Robin felt a headache forming from the conversation going on.

Eventually, he felt a tug on his ropes.

He turned around to see Frederick sleeping... For some reason... and Lissa trying to undo his ropes.

"Come with me." she whispered. "I'll take you to the garrison."

"Garrison?" he whispered back? The ropes gave way, and the princess was already on her way.

Something was still telling him to run, yet for some reason, he felt that he should follow her.

Little did he know the consequences of his choice.

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><p><strong>AN: Got this chapter out rather quickly.**

**So yeah, I completely inverted everything about Emmeryn. I may have been influenced by TheWorldTimeForgot's review. What am I saying? I was.**

**So... If Emmeryn is crazy, is Plegia good?**

**Most likely. Anyways, I can't promise another chapter tomorrow, nor can I promise another chapter for Change of Fate this week. If I can get the motivation to finish off that cliffhanger for the latter, I will gladly do so.**

**So until then...**

**...**

**Thought I would say something there? Naw.**


	3. The Psychopaths

**A/N: At long last, here is chapter 3. Sorry about the slightly late update, I was a bit caught up in my other story.  
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><p>Robin had continued to follow Lissa until they arrived at a sort of mansion.<p>

Lissa then unlocked the door and proceeded to lead Robin into the main hall.

"We have reached our destination." she turns toward Robin and bows.

Just then, a woman appearing of noble-origin stumbled into the room.

"Lissa!" she yelled. "'Bout time you got here! I was afraid Vaike would force me to have tea with him!" she ran up to Lissa and hugged her, earning a chuckle from Robin.

"So, squirt?" a new voice asked. Robin looked over to see a new girl with pink armor and brown hair observing the group. "Where's Chrom? C'mon. You know about our little... thing."

_What?_

"Hah. She want him back already? I thought she was enjoying her time away from that buffoon."Maribelle giggled.

"Wow, really Mari?" Sumia groaned. "Go swoon over Frederick or something."

This caused a blush to run across Maribelle's face, to which she responded by fleeing from the room.

"Works every time." Sumia smiled and looked toward Robin.

"Perhaps may I ask of your new acquaintance?" a seemingly shirtless man with a rough get-up approached them, holding an axe above his head.

"None else can be as acquainted as you, Vaike." Lissa gave a light giggle. "Yet I will tell you. This is Robin, our newest victi- Er... Shepherd. We found him at Southtown and we have decided to make him our tactician."

"But you didn't follow my-!"

"GREETINGS DEWDS AND DEWDETTES!" a familiar voice boomed across the room.

Sumia then smiled and proceeded to run out of Robin's vision.

He turned to see none other than Chrom... with a black eye... with Sumia leaning at his side.

Nearby was Frederick... Whose shirt was off again for some reason.

"I'm gonna keep things short. Emm's making us go to Ferox to get some tribute from their leaders, and pretty much all of you are coming with me."

This earns groans from several of the Shepherds, which angers Chrom.

"I HAVE A SWORD, BASTARDS!" he screams. "YOU REMEMBER WHAT HAPPENED TO CHARLIE LAST TIME I USED THIS THING HERE!"

_...What? Who is Charlie?_

"EXACTLY!" Chrom laughs like a madman. "WE'RE LEAVING TOMORROW. 'KAY?"

This earns robot-like responses, followed by salutes from each of the Shepherds.

_I should have run._

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><p>"This is your room." Lissa mutters. "Beware: Sometimes toxic gases may leak from Miriel's room. Whatever you do, don't breathe them in."<p>

This causes the last ounce of Robin's confidence to shrink out of existence.

"Wait! Can I-?!" Before he could finish, Lissa had slammed the door into his face, a small click signalizing that she had locked it.

Sigh... He turned around, only to notice a giant man wearing a suit of armor sitting on the other side of his room.

"So? You're my new roomie, huh?" he asks Robin.

"Y-Yes...?"

"I'm Kellam. I'm assuming the others already mentioned me?"

"No. I didn't hear a Kellam."

"Well that was retarded of them. Everyone says I have lots of presence. How could they NOT think of me?!" he chuckles and turns back around, before sitting on a nearby bed. "By the way, it's your turn to sleep on the floor." he turns and proceeds to fall onto the bed, creating a very deep impression onto it.

Robin stood there for a second, dumbfounded. "Where's the bathroom?" he asked.

Kellam poked his head out of the armor, before pointing at the corner of the room.

_...Why am I not surprised? _he mentally facepalmed at the bucket sitting in the corner, and then looked down to the floor.

_You know, I don't have to go that badly after all. _He yawned, before getting on his knees and resting on the floor.

He then yawned and looked over to his new roommate, then the door. He then let his eyes close, and drifted off to sleep.

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><p>Robin was awoken in a panic. His eyes jolted open, only to see himself hanging of of Frederick's shoulder. And he was still shirtless for some reason.<p>

"Greetings, my pleasured acquaintance." Vaike walked up and bowed. "I see you have already become aware of your unique predicament." he gives a sophisticated chuckle, before pulling a small cup out of seemingly nowhere. "Tea?"

Robin shook his head. "No thanks, I don't know where that's been."

The fighter simply laughed, before turning around and walking away.

"Hey Freeeedddy-Beaaaaar...?" Sully and her horse pranced up to the not-very-stern lieutenant, holding her hands behind her back. "I've gotta surprise for you..."

_Let me guess. Something stupid. _Robin groaned internally.

"What is it Sully?" Frederick asked.

"Close your eyes and hold out your hands..."

"What is-?"

"CLOSE THEM!" Sully screamed.

Frederick jumped, before frowning and following her directions.

From behind her back, she pulled a small dog. She proceeded to place the puppy into his hands, giggling slightly. "Okay... You can open them now." she grinned.

"Hrm? What is- OHGODSWHAT IS THIS?!" the man screamed, dropping both Robin and the dog, before running off into the distance.

Both Robin and the dog gave a yelp of pain.

"Aw... That was mean... Let me help you." Sully gave a pitiful smile, before walking over to Robin...

And then turning toward the dog. She scoops it into her hands, cradling it into her arms and looking at Robin.

When the tactician had finally gotten up, Sully was still staring at the dog. "D'aww... You're so cute... Who's a good boy?! You ar... You know what? I'm tired of this mutt." she groans, taking the puppy and holding it out to Robin. "You want it? If not, just give it to Miriel."

Robin's emotions had shifted from confusion, to shock, to aggravation, and then back to confusion. At that point, he was questioning his sanity... Which he did on an almost hourly basis.

He was about to open his mouth to say no, but Sully and her horse had already pranced off into the distance.

"So... I guess we're stuck with eachother." Robin looked toward the dog. "Are you going to treat me like an idiot?" he asked.

In response, the dog had bitten him. This caused Robin to freak out and drop the dog, who had then scurried off into the distance.

Even the animals didn't like Robin. What was going wrong with his life?

"On the bright side... This can't get any worse..." he whispered to himself.

Just then, he felt someone put a hand on his shoulder. Robin turned to see Chrom, with Sumia still hanging off of his shoulder. "Hey, Rob bro, I just wanted to tell you that there are a bunch of hungry zombies sitting at the bridge. And I want you to kill them."

He just had to say it, didn't he?

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><p><strong>AN: There. I have it.**

**Now everyone go crazy at the fact that I am introducing more inverted personalities. Actually, they aren't as inverted as they appear. For the most part, I'm only changing most of their personalities. Their fears and tempers are being completely untouched, an example being Frederick and Sully.**

**I'm not telling you when to expect another chapter in the event that I end up on another inactive spell.**


	4. Scholar Realm

**A/N: Yeah, did it again. So much for priority. Anyways, my other story is on a temporary sort of hiatus, so I'll have some time to update this.**

**And it's longer. Whew.**

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><p>"Good... Gods..." Robin gasps, just as the last Risen bursts out of existence.<p>

"Thanks, Rob-bro." Chrom and Sumia walk past the weak tactician. "Now we're gonna go talk to a bunch of scholars. Hope you brought your negotiation pants."

Robin looks up, confused at what Chrom just asked him. He gets up to follow them, noticing Lissa and Frederick tagging along as well.

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><p>Eventually, they reach a hill.<p>

"What is that...?" Robin asks himself. They all reach the peak of the hill, the small group spotting a rather large pegasus sitting at the top of it.

And bizarrely, it was saddled and seemingly battle-ready.

"Cool! A flying pony!" Chrom screams. He immediately lets go of Sumia, before rushing toward the pegasus.

He does not even get a glimpse at the animal before he is knocked unconscious.

_Where were you when I was being kidnapped? _Robin internally groaned. The pegasus neighs happily at the unconscious prince, kicking it one more time.

"Hey." Sumia walks up to the pegasus. "Here, take this carrot." she smiles and holds out exactly what she said she was.

The pegasus neighs happily, before leaning toward the carrot.

Sumia immediately moves it away from it. "Nope. Only if you promise to not beat up my boyfriend and instead become my permanent slave."

The pegasus makes the exact same noise as before.

Sumia smiles, before holding out the vegetable.

The pegasus accepts.

Robin immediately gets on his knees, only to scream into the sky. That is the unfortunate result of having your only hope for freedom taken away from you just seconds after having first received it.

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><p>It is only a couple of hours until they reach the border to Regna Ferox.<p>

For whatever reason, Sumia had stayed behind. According to her, something about "Pulling a heroic entrance at the most unexpected moment possible." Even the tactical genius had no idea what she was talking about. Then again, little had seemed to make sense to the tactician.

"I-I-It is so cold..." Lissa mutters. "F-Frederick? Could you let me-?"

"No." Frederick glares toward the princess. "I don't care if there are Risen surrounding you, I'm not letting you steal my warmth."

Lissa frowns, and the group is silent.

They soon reach a large fortress, only to spot a large army stationed on top of it.

Chrom groans. "Great. There they are." He then turns toward Robin? "Do you have your negotiation pants? I think you'll need them with these pricks."

Robin nods, ignoring the 'pricks' comment. "I do. I shall state our business, and if diplomacy is not an option, I have already prepared a battle plan."

"Okay." Chrom rolls his eyes.

"Based on the given descriptions of the Fer-!"

"YOU DON'T HAVE TO TELL ME, MORON!" Chrom yells.

Robin blinks. "But you're our captain, wouldn't you want to know what our battle plan would-!"

"Battle plan, no battle plan. It doesn't matter. All that matters is that we have Frederick." he points toward the great knight. "He can oneshot everything! We don't even need to focus time or effort into our other soldiers in the event that the enemy grows too strong to handle Frederick."

The prince and his knight laugh, while meanwhile Robin simply rolls his eyes and walks toward the fortress.

"Greetings." he announces. "We are the Shepherds, led by Prince Chrom of Ylisse. We wish to speak to the Khan."

"Ah. Alright." a woman on the roof of the fortress walks forward, looking down upon the tactician. "I notify the guards that you are here." she turns around toward a nearby man, a mage, by the looks of it.

"Open the doors! These are the Ylisseans!" she announces.

The mage nods. "Yes, Mistress Raimi." he turns toward a nearby lever and begins to turn it.

_Huh? No battle? That's fine by me._ Robin laughs internally. _Today may finally be a decent-!_

"Hey! Morons!" Robin freezes up, not even turning toward the voice behind him.

The guards stop. "What is it, Lord Chrom?"

"SHEPHERDS! ATTACK!"

Robin blinks. _What?_

The guard next to the lever jumps as he spots his comrades being attacked by the Shepherds. "M-Milord, it is fine! We can give you whatever you-!"

"Just shut up and fight, fancypants!"

A few of the guard on top of the fortress rush to the front, pulling out weapons and tossing them toward the prince.

"No! NO! THIS IS THE END OF- Ow! Gah! Oof!" Chrom is quickly knocked onto the ground by a barrage of projectiles.

_Books._ Robin could feel his palm progressively getting closer to his face.

BOOKS. "Chrom! They are just books! There is no way that they hurt that-!"

"GAAAAAH!" Chrom leans up, holding his arm and screaming.

Robin sighs. "Now what?"

"I HAVE A PAPERCUT!" the prince falls onto his side, clutching his arm and screaming like a madman.

Robin was about to ignore him and assist the other Shepherds, yet only after he turned had he noticed that the other Shepherds had already subdued the Feroxi threat.

Robin facepalmed. Had the enemy not used ordinary books as their primary choice of weapon, Robin possibly could have been impressed.

Yet he still wasn't surprised. It did not take a wary individual to see that Frederick was the only one on the fortress, while the other Shepherds were simply sitting at the base of the building. And the knight was shirtless again.

_How is he not bothered by this cold?_ Robin asked himself.

He simply sighed, before dragging Chrom to the peak of the fort.

"AHHHHH! IT HURTS SO- Oh, look. We won." Chrom immediately stops clutching his arm, only to get back onto his feet and look toward the injured Raimi. "You can let us in now." he says.

"Y-Yes, milord." she gasps. She limps toward the lever, before turning it.

"Oh come on!" They hear a distant voice. They all turn to see a familiar Pegasus Knight fly onto the fort.

"Hey, Sumi!" Chrom grins.

Sumia jumps off of the pegasus and into Chrom's arms, the latter seemingly forgetting that we was unable to stand just a minute ago.

Raimi soon stops twisting the lever. "A-Alright, Milord. We have done the deed."

Chrom lets go of Sumia, who falls to the ground with a yelp, before turning toward the commander.

He tilts his head. "That's not good enough. We are going to need an escort to the castle, now, and you are going to dance like a monkey for me."

"Y-Yes... Milord.." The woman gasps. She leans upward, futilely attempting to dance.

"Not good enough." Chrom rolls his eyes. "Your whole army has to do it."

"B-But milord..." Raimi frowns. "You killed them all..."

Chrom frowns, examining the battlefield. "Oh. You're right." He shakes his head and shrugs. "Oh well. Just escort us then. But you still have to dance for me."

Raimi groans, before limping toward the stairway.

And meanwhile, Robin simply stares in horror.

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><p><strong>AN: I may have gone a bit overboard there.**

**Maybe more than a little.**

**Yeaaaaaah. There's no denying that I must have been in a really weird mood to have thought of this.**

**Anyways, the updates for this chapter will probably be a bit more frequent now, given that Change of Fate is not going to be updated for a little while. I may push an update some time soon, yet I can't promise anything.**

**Nor can I promise another update soon.**

**Anyways, do whatever you want, readers.**


	5. Two Idiots

**A/N: Agh! As I've had to state three times already, I'm sorry for the lack of updates! I'm aware that I pretty much promised that I would have more updates, but I've just been suffering from all of the enemies of a fanfiction writer. Writer's block, school, real-life things, sickness, bad internet, laziness, and the list goes on.  
><strong>

**But yes... I had a lot of fun with this chapter. My inspiration has returned, and it will not leave for a while. Or maybe it will. Three months feels like nothing to me.**

**Could not help but notice that it took this story only four chapters to get 10 favorites and 20 reviews even though it took 20 chapters to do the same in Change of Fate.**

**You know what? I'm now putting priority over this. The gloves are coming off. You thoughts the inverted personalities were enough? No... I am just beginning to abuse my author powers. Mwaha... Mwhahaha... MWAHAHAHAHAHA-*cough* Ack! Why does it always end like-! *cough* *cough***

**Warning: I'm not kidding when I say I went insane when I was making this chapter.**

* * *

><p>It was not too long before they had arrived to the capital of Regna Ferox.<p>

"W-We have arrived at the Khan's room, milord." Raimi limps to the entrance of the room, guiding the group toward a large throne.

Chrom lifts his hand.

"No! P-Please! Do not hurt me, Lord Chrom!" Raimi squealed.

Chrom chuckled. "What? Nah. I was just going to high-five you." this prompts Raimi to sigh in relief. "Buuuut..." Chrom pauses. "Just for that, I think I'll go ahead and do it anyways."

The prince punched the woman, knocking her unconscious upon contact.

_Why... _Robin cringed.

"So, who are the Khans anyways?" Frederick asked in an almost exposition-ish manner.

"They are just ultra nerds. Probably just like every other person in this country." Chrom laughs. "Willing to bet they are some crusty old man that probably takes ten minutes to take a few steps."

"Ah, excuse me?" A feminine voice announces.

"Huh?" Chrom turned toward the voice, spotting a female hero with red armor and blonde hair. "So, you the house keeper?"

"No, I am the-!"

"Librarian?"

"You are wrong again, I am the-!"

"Fitness Trainer...?"

"No, no, no!"

"Oh, I get it now!" Chrom's face lights up. "You're the stripper!"

Robin groaned rather loudly.

"No, Prince Chrom. I am the K-!"

"I don't care! Strip!"

"Naga, Chrom. Must you be such a pig around the presence of the Khan?" Lissa facepalms.

Chrom pauses, looking at his sister, then looking at the woman. "Ooooooooooh..." Causing a sigh of relief from everyone else. "Why didn't you tell me you were the Khan, Lissa?!"

_Is it just me, or did he get more stupid since the last battle? _Robin asks himself.

**Tell me about it. Three months of doing nothing probably rots your brain.**

_Yeah, I would expect it to-! Wait, three months? It's only been a few hours. _Robin pauses. _And wait, who are you?!_

**Oh. I'm the author.**

_What?! What do you mean author? Do you mean you are the one that did this all to me?!  
><em>

**Yes?**

_How dare you! Do you know what despicable things that have happened to me?!_

**Tell me about it. I can't believe I had to resort to the 'Author communicating to character in his own story' joke.  
><strong>

_Author... Communication... What?! Are you saying I'm in a story?!_

**Oops. I've said too much. I should probably leave before I ruin everything.  
><strong>

_Hey! Wait! WHO ARE YOU?! _ The mysterious voice seemed to have disappeared. Who was this mysterious and charming author? The one that attracts all of the woman and the... Ahem. Apologies"

"I promise you, milord! I am indeed the Eastern Khan of Regna Ferox!" The woman yells.

"Okay, fine." Chrom groans. "...Stripper."

"What was that?" The woman glares at the prince.

"Nothing..." he snickers.

"A-Anyways, I apologize for the misunderstanding at the gate." the Khan groans. "I am Flavia, by the way."

"Yeah. I can't believe the guards just attacked us without a warning." Chrom chuckles.

_Seriously? Now you are just going to lie?_ For our white-haired tactician simply keeps learning new things.

"Y'know... I think this misunderstanding may lead to war. You may need to pay extra tribute."

"N-No!" Flavia yells. "Regna Ferox cannot handle another conflict! Eastern Regna Ferox is not in charge of the wealth at the moment!"

"Well that's too bad..." Chrom laughs. "I sure hope Emmeryn doesn't find out about this."

Flavia gasps. "Please, milord! There is another way!"

Chrom pauses. "Is there...?"

"Yes! There is a convenient tournament occurring in about five minutes! Your army can fight against Western Ferox's army! If you win, I will gain control and we can give you your tribute money!"

Chrom holds out his hand. "It's a deal!"

And so Robin shuddered in fear.

* * *

><p>The group of six Shepherds were gathered at the entrance to the arena.<p>

"Alright. So I have decided at having Stahl, Miriel, Lissa, Kellam, and I will accompany you, Chrom."

Chrom stares at the tactician, dumbfounded. "You aren't bringing Frederick?! We don't need those crappy fighters when we have Frederick!"

Chrom approaches the four other soldiers. "You guys... Get the hell outta here."

Stahl, Miriel, Lissa, and Kellam bow their heads in shame, and slowly paced out of the room.

"Chrom! We could lose without this unit support! How do you expect to win the battle with only three people?!" Robin growls.

"Three people? We have Frederick. We don't even need three people when we have him." The prince laughs.

Suddenly, the gates shut behind them.

"Let the tournament begin!"

_This is a pretty unbalanced tournament if you ask me__... _Robin groans internally.

The Feroxi soldiers rush toward the Shepherds, the latter simply sitting there doing nothing.

"Wait a second..." At the back of the arena, Chrom spots the same blue-haired swordsman that he had seen during the first Risen attack. "Hey! You're that really weird guy from the attack of the potato zombies!"

"R-Really?" The masked man chuckles. "I wasn't credited for my appearance in that film."

"I don't mean the film." Chrom glares.

"Oh, well... Hey, want to have an awesome duel while our soldiers just watch and cheer on because they apparently can't think independently?" the man asks.

"Oh, sure." Chrom grins. "I'm totally going to destroy you."

Chrom jumps into the air, defying gravity and flying toward the center of the arena, with the other lord doing to same.

The both landed face-to-face, unsheathing their swords and pointing them toward eachother.

"Cool. We have matching swords." Chrom looked back toward the Shepherds. "Oh, yeah, and Frederick is shirtless again."

**Oh, yeah, almost forgot to add that running joke to this chapter.**

The two Falchions collided, sending shockwaves across the arena.

Each collision of the parallel blades sent sparks flying into the faces of the lords. Each hit and each maneuver sent one further back, yet neither seemed to be gaining the advantage.

"Dude! You fight like a pimp! Tell me how!" Chrom yelled, placing his sword into an offensive position and doing a diving maneuver.

"Weeeeeell... Let's see..." Marth stopped swinging his sword and paused. "Itallstartedabouttwentyyearsintothefuturewheneverythingishappyandylisseruledeverything.  
>Iwasbornandsomestuffhappenedandyoudiedbutfirstyoutaughtmeeverythingyouknewandgavemeyourswordandyeahiamyourdaughterfromthefutureandicametothepastto<br>helpyoubygettinginyourwayandcausingyoudirectphyicalharmbecauseiamagreatdaugghterlikethat." Marth stopped to catch his breath. "OhyeahididmentionimgoingbyMarthrightbecauseiam."

"Okay. Cool." Chrom raised his sword again, but den he droped it.

'marth have i ever said that i luv you.' chrom said to the sexy blue marth.

'i totaly kno dady.' marth droped his swrd 2 and they started to hug.

'that is totly cool and i hope i can wach this 4ever. ' robin smled. 'hey fred haz i ever sad tat you r the kewlest prson evr?'

'yeh robn ikr bevcuz im so hawt.' fred n robn totly strted mking ot and thn al of the ferox guys joined in and thn me n al mah frends cam n an we al startd makin out an- **HEY! HEY! GET OUT OF HERE!**

**Ahem. Apologies for that. I just went to the bathroom for five seconds and when I came back some random girl was at my computer.**

_What?! Was I just kissing Frederick?! _Robin gasps, proceeding to take his sword and scrape his tongue in disgust.

"What the hell just happened?" Chrom shakes his head, looking toward Marth. "I feel like I a part of a shipping."

"**Heh. Yeah. About that... There is unfortunately an army of angry teenage girls that now want you to continue making out. So... Yeah.**"

"I guess this means we only have one choice." Robin mutters. pacing backwards toward Marth and the other Ferox soldiers.

The Shepherds and the Feroxi mages were surrounded by the rabid fangirls. They had only one way to get out.

"We have to fight our way out of this." Robin mutters. The other men nod in agreement. "This may be difficult. We may not make it out of here alive, but we have to defeat this threat to peace!"

"Hah! I'm already a threat to peace!" Chrom laughs.

Just as girls had drawn closer, the soldiers advanced.

Weapons and magic flew. Blood was shed.

They fought for hours.

They fought powerfully.

They fought as they knew their lives depended on it.

Yet in the end,

They did not win.

...

... Er, the fangirls, I mean.

The Shepherds had won. And the Feroxi soldiers were all conveniently dead. Except for Marth, because he was just missing for some reason.

* * *

><p>"You fought good, my friends." A bald man with an eyepatch approaches the Shepherds. "I have never seen such wonderful fighting."<p>

"Thanks, baldy." Chrom chuckles. "Now, who the hell are you?"

"I am Khan Basilio. Western Khan of Regna Ferox. I am very glad to see that Flavia has won this tournament. I was very confident in her leading abilities, though I daresay that I did not expect a flock of teenage girls to pop into thin air.

Robin sighs. "It's all the author's fault."

"The author?" the others ask.

"Oh, yeah! The author!" Lissa grins. "He's the best! I'm totally not being forced to say this in an attempt to make forced humor!"

"Dude. Get out of Lissa." Robin groans. _I never thought I would say that to anyone.  
><em>

**Okay. Fine. But you haven't seen the last of MakBlaze6. Because yeah. You haven't. I'll be back. Someday. I'll-!**

"Okay!" Chrom yells. "I get it!"

**Fine... Stripper...**

"What was that?!" Chrom yells again.

There was no response.

"Great. Anyways, for defeating me in battle, I have a gift for you." Basilio backed away, revealing a tall man in dark hair.

"Heeeey. I'm Lon'qu." Lon'qu waves. "Do you have any women?"

Lissa nods. "Yes, I am a woman."

"Kewl." Lon'qu laughs, before creepily getting close to Lissa.

_What? _That was the one thought that remained in Robin's mind as they left the arena.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: I suppose the pure amount of illogical randomness in this chapter compensates for the lack of updates. If it doesn't? That's fine. I was just trying to refresh myself so that I could get back into this story.  
><strong>

**Seriously, though. I think it's going to take a few chapters to get the fourth wall back together. The other chapters are going to go back to normal after this. I just had to include these ideas so I could actually be inspired to write this chapter.  
><strong>

**Disclaimer: This chapter was not intended to hate toward any people that ship a particular pairing.**


	6. Happy King Gangrel

**A/N: Writing every single chapter in a nutshell:  
><strong>

**Me: Huh? People want to me to update soon. I'll do it tomorrow.**

***next day***

**Me: Eh, I'm a bit stumped right now. I'll do it tomorrow.**

***repeat for two months***

**So yeah...**

**Oh, and Robin and Lucina confirmed for Smash Bros. Robin was my most wanted character... So that's nice.  
><strong>

**But yeah, due to the fact that I haven't updated in a while, please excuse if the tense has randomly changed since the last chapter.**

* * *

><p>After the tournament, Flavia had agreed to give them tribute money.<p>

They most certainly had deserved it after what they had gone through.

They eventually reached the palace in Ylisstol, where they awaited further instruction from Emmeryn.

"Ah. So Ferox is back in order." Emmeryn grinned, caressing a random cat.

"Yes, Emmeryn." Chrom smiles.

"Ahem." she coughs into her palm.

"I mean... Superior Overlord and Supreme Ruler of the Universe Emmeryn."

"That's better." the exalt smiles.

Robin rolls his eyes. He simply wished that he could be doing something else.

His thoughts were then interrupted by a loud scream.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" A white-haired Pegasus Knight dashes into the room.

Emmeryn and Chrom both turn their heads toward her, annoyed looks on their faces.

"What do you want, Philia?" Emmeryn groans.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" The Pegasus Knight then realized that she was asked a question. She stopped screaming, and looked toward the exalt. She inhaled deeply. "AAAAAAAAAAAAAH!LADYEMMERYNIT'STERRIBLETHEKINGOFPLEGIAHASTHEDUKE'SDAUGHTER!"

Emmeryn frowns at the Pegasus Knight. "What?

Philia shakes her head, inhaling again. "ISAIDAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!LADYEMMERYNIT'STERRIBLETHEKINGOFPLEGIAHASTHEDUKE'SDAUGHTER!"

Robin sighed. Was everyone in this palace insane? "SPEAK. SLOWLY." he yells. Only then did he realize that he had actually said it out loud.

"Oh." Philia said, her panicked look disappearing. "AAAAAAAAAAAAAH. LADY. EMMERYN. IT'S. TERRIBLE. THE. KING. OF. PLEGIA. HAS. THE. DUKE'S. DAUGHTER."

"Oh, you mean Maribelle?" Emmeryn smiles. She turns toward Chrom. "Gather the Shepherds and all of the army. We're going to march up to Plegia Castle. I need a new head on my fireplace."

"Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!" Robin shakes his head. "Shouldn't we at least TRY to negotiate before committing regicide?"

"Ne...go...ti...ate...?" Emmeryn says. "What is that supposed to mean?"

"Just... Forget it." Robin says. "What's so bad about this... King of Plegia anyways?"

Chrom frowns. "Dude's a monster. Think of him... Like the bad version of me and Emm."

Robin gulps. Bad... Version...? Of Chrom? He feared for his life.

"Yeah." Philia pipes up. "I heard he spits on orphans."

* * *

><p><strong><em>Meanwhile<em>**

"Please read us another story, Papa Gangrel!" the small boy begs.

"Yeah! Pretty please Papa Gangrel?!" a little girl jumps in joy.

"Now, now, little ones. It is well past your bedtime..." King Gangrel smiles. "But if you really want me to, I will..." He laughs and pull out another book. "This is a story that my father used to read all of the time...

"I don't remember my father..." the little girl frowns.

Gangrel smiles. "Do not worry. He probably is out there looking for you..."

The little girl's frown disappears, replaced by a smile. "We love you, Papa Gangrel!"

The king smiles. "I love you too, children."

* * *

><p>"Hah. Yeah." Chrom chuckles. "Well I heard he drowns kittens."<p>

* * *

><p><em><strong>Elsewhere<strong>_

The children finally tucked in bed, Gangrel eventually steps out of the room.

"It is a beautiful night... Perhaps I should go take a midnight stroll..."

He laughs, walking down his grand staircase and to his door. He pulls the door open, only to hear a faint mewing.

Looking down, he spots a basket of tiny kittens looking up at him.

"Aw... Poor little things." he says, picking up the basket. He brings them into his home, staring at the tiny faces. "You must be starving."

Gangrel smiles. "Ah, yes. I think I have some milk down in the kitchen."

With that, he scoops each of the kittens out of the basket and gently holds them at his side. "Now, now, little ones." she chuckles, stroking the small felines.

* * *

><p>"He sounds terrible..." Robin mutters.<p>

"Yeah. He is. But who knows why he has Maribelle." Emmeryn says. She turns toward Chrom. "Seriously. Get the army."

"Y-Yes Superior Overlord and Supreme Ruler of the Universe Emmeryn." Chrom nods and dashes away.

Robin frowns. Two corrupt rulers? Could this get any worse?

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN I HAVE TO GO WITH YOU?!" Robin suddenly hears a boy yell. "YOU DO KNOW THAT I'M LIKE, FOURTEEN, RIGHT?!"

"Yeah." Robin hears Chrom's voice. "And I want you to help us kill Gangrel."

"DUDE. DO YOU SERIOUSLY WANT ME TO ENDANGER MY OWN LIFE JUST SO YOU GUYS CAN HAVE PERSONAL REVENGE ON SOME RICH GUY?! SCREW YOU GUYS."

He hears Chrom growl a bit, followed by a bit of screaming.

"DO IT!"

"WHAT?! NOOOOO! NOOOOO!"

"FIGHT IN THE WAR, RICKEN!"

"AHHHH! NOT THE WHIP!"

Robin attempted to block out the following screams.

"So... Birdy. Can I come with?" Emmeryn grins.

"What?! No! It wouldn't exactly be wise to put the ruler of Ylisse out in the center of a battlefield."

"Well Chrom's out there."

"Chrom's an idi-... I mean, Chrom's can use a sword. He has an excuse."

"So? I have tomes of infinite destruction. Magical spells that can scorch, rip apart, and drain the life force of any person who so much as looks at me the wrong way." the exalt grins maniacally. "Do you want to see what happens when you cross that line?"

Robin pales. "T-That won't be necessary... You can go, Your Grace."

"Your Grace?" Emmeryn growls. "What, you think this is some kind of monarchy?!"

"E-Er..."

"You know what I am supposed to be called..."

"A-Ah! Y-Y-Y-Yes! Yes Superior Overlord and Supreme Ruler of the Universe Emmeryn!"

"Go get the army, Birdy." Emmeryn grins.

"I will do so!"

* * *

><p>And so Robin stood marching toward the border, confused as to how he had gotten into this situation.<p>

And then he heard a horse gallop toward him.

"E-Er, hello..." A cavalier on a green horse approached. "I-I'm Stahl."

"Hello Stahl. Are you crazy too?"

"Crazy? I-I don't... I'm not sure... Er..."

Robin yawned, taking his satchel and pulling out a slice of bread. He held it toward Stahl. "Are you hungry?" he asked.

"N-No. I ate last week." he muttered.

Robin shrugs. _This is my weekly salary anyways._ he thought. _Why would I want to give it to him?_

**I needed an excuse to introduce some of the other characters that I forgot to show before.**

_ You again?!_ Robin internally growled. _You are the one that made me... Do intimate things with Frederick!_

**I told you already. That wasn't me, that some random girl that managed to get into my house. Yeah. I don't get it either.**

_Just... Leave me alone! I don't need you leaving a path of destruction everywhere I go!_

**... I can kill off some of the Shepherds...**

_... Come again?_ Robin felt a grin spread across his face. _What I could get rid of Chrom and Emmeryn..._

**Yeah. Just give me the word and someone will die.**

Robin paused. Was it really a smart idea to end someone's life? And just for his own purposes?

**Oh, and if you start to miss them, I can just revive them out of nowhere.**

_Deal!_

**Your wish is my command!**

Suddenly an arrow whisked by Robin's head. Just as it exited his peripheral vision, he heard a scream.

"Agh! Not like this-!..." Robin heard Virion scream.

He turned his head to see a fallen Virion with an arrow sticking out of his chest.

_... When I said for you to kill someone, I didn't mean to slay the innocent people!_

**Er... Oops. Hold on.**

Suddenly Virion was up on his feet again, grinning.

"Ah! I, the Archest of Archers Virion, have been brought back from the depths of hell!" he grins, turning toward Sully. "So tell me, milady, would you be so kind as to be my loving bride?"

Sully grins. "I do!" she jumps off of her horse and lands on the archer, squealing in happiness.

_What just happened?_ Robin internally asked.

**Er... I think when I revived him, I accidentally fixed his personality.**

_Fixed...? Wait. You are telling me that he wasn't actually normal?! _Robin gasped. He opened his mouth and lifted his head to the sky.

"MY BEST FRIEEEEEEEEEEEEND!" he screamed.

* * *

><p>They soon reached a canyon.<p>

"Why, if it isn't the Exalt herself, Lady Emmeryn!" Robin heard an unfamiliar voice yell. "We have not talked in a while. You are looking just as beautiful as always."

"Gangrel." Emmeryn groans. "You know what I want. So give it to me."

"Ah, could it be the girl?" the white-haired woman in revealing clothing asked.

"Lawl. No. And who the hell are you?"

"Oh, I-I'm... Aversa..." Aversa paused, seeing all of the people staring at her. "P-Please don't stare at me..." She turned away from the crowd, fleeing out of sight.

"Whatever." Emmeryn shrugs. "Can we have Mari-whatever now?"

Gangrel nods. "Of course, she was being attacked by wolves, so we were trying to return her to your country. We knew that she was from Ylisse. She is having tea with some of our soldiers right now."

Robin gasps. Could they have been... Wrong about him? Was there actually a sane man right in front of him?! Someone who he could understand?!

Suddenly, a scream echoed across the valley. "HEEEEEELP! LADY EMMERYN! THIS TEA IS DELICIOUS!" Robin heard Maribelle scream.

"Oh no! She's supposed to like my tea **MORE**!" Emmeryn yelled.

"O-Oh." Gangrel gives a nervous smile. "I could give you the recipe if you want it."

"Oh, I want it." Emmeryn smiles, with Gangrel pulling out a notepad. "OVER YOUR DEAD BODY!"

Gangrel paused. "Er, alright. Later, then?" he turns his head up toward the canyon. "Anyways... Aversa! Let the woman go!"

"I don't care about Maribelle, Mangrel! Emmeryn growls. "I just want your head!"

"Ah, but I insist. Here, while you are at it, I'll send over a piece of my vault. I most certainly owe such to you after receiving just kindness and devotion from your father."

"DON'T SPEAK OF OUR DAD'S NAME YOU TWAT!" Chrom screams.

"I can't take it anymore..." Robin muttered under his breath. He takes a breath, before running straight out of the crowd of Ylisseans and into the swarm of Plegians. "**SAVE ME KING GANGREEEEEEEEEEL!**" he screamed.

"You heard the tactician!" Chrom yelled. "CHARGE!"

The army of Ylisseans roared, rushing toward the Plegian army in a swarm of blades.

"A-Agh! Flee my subjects! Do not risk your lives for my protection!" Gangrel yelled, rushing away from the battlefield.

"No, my king. We will not sit back and let the exalt slay you. We will defend you until the end of the world!" the Plegian Captain nodded. The Plegian soldiers all cheered in agreement.

"Captain Orton... Thank you... I owe my life to you." Gangrel smiles. "Grima bless you!"

Just as King Gangrel had rode away, Captain Orton smiled.

"Captain, I will not fail you," he placed a palm on his wyvern, before drawing an axe and soaring into combat.

Yet Robin simply sat in a corner, sobbing at his hopeless goal.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Whew! That ended up a bit longer than I expected it to be!**

**But yeah. I did a whole bunch of... Whatever. Like demonstrating more of my awesome author abilities!**

**... Like sinking ships!**

_Ships? What do you mean by sinking shi-!_

**Shut up Robin. I didn't ask for your opinion, even if you are just a figment of my imagination.**

_Imagination?! People are dying out-!_

**SHUSH!**

**Anyways, I once again apologize for the constant delayed updates. My writing inspiration in general has not been around for a while.**

**And forgive me if this chapter wasn't as funny as the others. The one problem with writing jokes is that you can never tell if they are funny.**

**So... Yeah... There will be another chapter eventually. So you can look forward to that... If you happen to have time to wait a few months for it...  
><strong>


	7. Dumbseer

**A/N: I remembered that people liked this story. Frankly, it was a crime to abandon it.**

**BUT NO MORE, MY CHILDREN!**

* * *

><p>And so he shed many tears.<p>

Many, many salty tears. Knowing that he could not escape.

"Hey Rob-bro?" Chrom was sitting on the other side of the room, wrapped around Sumia. "Could you, like, be in absolute despair in another room? We're sorta busy."

"Hey Chrom, how about you show me that sword of-"

Robin had already dashed out of the room before Sumia had finished her sentence.

* * *

><p>And so Robin had sat in the garden, alone.<p>

He contemplated his thoughts. He thought of the painful, severe whippings that Superior Overlord and Supreme Ruler of the Universe Emmeryn had inflicted upon him.

He could barely stand.

"Hey Bird-face" Chrom casually strolled into the garden. "Sup?"

Suddenly there was a rustling in the bushes.

"Oh yes daddy!" Marth, the mysterious blue-haired definitely without a doubt a man yelled.

"Oh look, Rob-bro. It's this idiot. This ugly, high pitched little squealing guy."

Robin rolled his eyes. He didn't care. How could he.

"Oh, hey dad. Just wanted to tell you that there are a bunch of assassins wanting to murder your sister."

"Oh, you mean Lissa? I don't really care."

"Actually, I'm talking about the Superior Overlord and Supreme Ruler of the Universe Emmeryn."

Chrom paled. "OH NONONONO! NOT MY BEAUTIFUL SISTER! HOW COULD THOSE MONSTERS EVER DO SOMETHING SO HORRID?!"

Robin let out a loud sob, yet remained ignored.

"Oh, wait, hold on." Marth paused. He quickly did a backflip, flying off into the air and landing on the ground as an assassin rushed through the bushes. His blade cut through the man instantly, and the assassin died instantly.

"Damn. You wouldn't believe how many worlds I had to go through before I pulled that off." Marth said.

"I don't really care. You're really ugly." Chrom said.

Suddenly the bushes rustled once more. But Marth had no time to react. In an instant, a second assassin had sprang out of the shadows.

Marth had barely managed to dodge, yet his opponent's sword had managed to cut the blue-haired swordsman's mask.

Chrom quickly ran into the action, slicing the assassin.

"Hah, that was eas-!" Chrom turned toward the 'man', yet was overtaken by his beauty. "Holy Naga crap you are hot."

"Yeah daddy I'm actually your daughter, not your son."

"Damn. You wanna come up to my bedroom in a bit, Sumia could totally-"

"Sorry daddy but we gotta keep Auntie Overlord from getting killed."

"OH CRAP YOU ARE RIGHT!" Chrom screamed. "I can't wear the punishment suit again!"

They quickly rushed into the castle, probably to warn the others.

But Robin just sat there, full of sadness.

He could do nothing... But wait for the assassins.

To kill... Emmeryn...

"Wait..." he said to himself.

He realized: he could join them. After they killed the tyrant, he could flee with them, to escape this wretched hell.

To escape the idiotic prince.

Robin quickly wiped the tears from his face and jumped onto his feet.

He was determined to escape this miserable existence.

* * *

><p>Fighting had already broken out by the time Robin arrived. Yet he didn't care. He didn't care who lived. Who died. Escape was the only thought on his mind.<p>

He dashed through the hallways, eyeing the assassins and desperately searching for their source.

He could hear pained screams all around him.

To any sane man, it would be horrifying. But to Robin, it was Tuesday.

The tactician spotted a group of thieves, including an orange-haired man sitting off in the corner.

"Hello there, respectable tactician." the thief bows.

Robin was confused again. This man was acting strange. The silver-haired victim was already afraid.

"I don't really desire to kill the tyrant of Ylisse. In fact, I would like to join you."

Robin sighed. "Just go over there. I don't really care."

The thief shrugged. "All right then. Perhaps I should state my identity. I am Gaius. And I happen to hate candy and all sweets with a passion so strong, that rivers transform into blood. And oh, might I add, certainly not sweet-tasting blood."

Robin ran away immediately.

* * *

><p>Robin could feel himself getting to the the leader. Along the way he thought he heard yellings of a 'rabbit girl' attempting to sell herself for profit. He felt it would be best to not find out more.<p>

Soon, he found himself outdoors once more.

He spotted the leader.

A tall sorcerer, with large, rather comically spiky brown hair.

He looked very menacing. Almost... Maniacal...

Then the sorcerer turned toward him.

"Ah, hello there." the mage bowed. "It's a pleasure to meet you."

"A-Are you with the assassins...?"

"Oh, we are not assassins... We only wanted to make peace... I'm sorry if we are causing trouble..."

Robin sighed. Of course. They were just like Gangrel.

"It's okay... I just want... To get out of here..." Robin muttered.

The sorcerer walked closer the Robin. Their gaze met.

Suddenly, a look of recognition had spread across his face. "S-Son...?!" He muttered, tears starting to well in his eyes.

Robin gasped. This man... He had felt familiar to him. Was he truly his father?! His emotions seemed so genuine. He felt himself beginning to get emotional as well.

With no words exchanged, the two hugged.

They sat there for a minute, so happy and relieved to have finally found eachother.

Eventually, they stopped hugging.

Oh, Robin, my wonderful, wonderful son..." The sorcerer cried. "I have missed you so much...!" He laughed. "I can't wait to catch up on all of the-!"

Robin felt blood spray into his face.

His heart stopped.

In front of him, was his father, frozen in pain and shock.

A lance sticking out of his chest.

They met gaze one last time, a single teardrop falling from his father's eye.

The man collapsed to the ground, dead.

Robin was speechless. He could shed no tears. He could feel no pain...

He looked up toward his father's murderer.

"'Sup?" asked Frederick, casually sitting on his horse. He was also shirtless.

Robin fell to his knees.

**"FAAAAAAAATHERRRRRR! DON'T LEAAAAVE MEEEEE!"**

* * *

><p><strong>AN: That was actually really easy to do. I forgot how fun that felt.**

**So sorry I neglected ye my poor readers. So sorry that I instead felt the need to rewrite my mediocre self-insert.**

**That nobody read, of course. But I digress.**

**Due to the lack of focus to the Shepherds this chapter, I didn't exactly get to introduce the new characters too well. Maaaybe I'll add a bit more focus on them later. It all depends.**

**Kudos to Knights of Yaru for actually giving me good ideas, though. Sorry that it took two years for those ideas to actually get written down, though.**


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